Something More
by seaofcolors
Summary: Cuddy is getting everything she had always wanted in life.  But is it with the right person.  This is my first fanfic...
1. The Proposal

This had been something she never thought she'd have to deal with. She always known that their relationship was too complicated for words, but it was something she had learned to deal with. She shoved them to the back of her mind and had intended that they would stay there. She never thought that the feeling would amount to anything more than simply feeling. Something she thought she could get through life just pushing to the back of her mind. And with his actions most the time, it was pretty easy.

But now, not so much…

She looked down at the man on his knee. The man who seemed perfect in every sense of the word. Perfect for her. Perfect for a husband. Perfect for a father for Rachel. Someone she could depend on. Someone she had always imagined having a future with. Someone she loved—well someone she that thought she loved. The only problem was it wasn't who she wanted it to be…

…it wasn't House…

Lucas, kneeling in front of her, asking her the question she has waited years for. The question she had wanted so badly to come. With a beautiful ring with a simple diamond that would fit her finger perfectly. And yet she didn't know what to say. He looked at her, starting to worry, seeing that he hadn't received an answer yet.

She looked at him and with her best attempt—she plastered on a smile and said "yes".

Placing the ring on her finger and jumping up, Lucas kissed her forehead and wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. He whispered something in her ear but she didn't really hear it. She was too focused on the ring and the feeling that was filling her heart, or the lack of feeling that was filling her heart.

She placed her arms around him gently and embraced him and faking enthusiasm. But little did he know that she regretted that one syllable word from the moment she uttered it.


	2. That Night

_Here's Chapter . Sorry this chapter isn't the best. I'm already starting to work on Chapter 3 and I promise that it will be much better than this one! :D I will try and post it by Monday (1/31) I hope you enjoy and thanks for the reviews and reading it! _

Lucas didn't come home with her that night. As much as he wanted to she really needed time to think. She gave him the best excuse she could think of, which just so happened to be the lamest excuse as well.

"I'm just not feeling the greatest. We'll celebrate tomorrow I promise but tonight I'd just like to go to sleep. We'll talk tomorrow."

"Alright, you did seem a bit out of it. I'll call you in the morning." Lucas said as leaned in for a kiss. But she really didn't want to kiss so she jerked her head down forcing him to kiss her forehead. Cuddy stepped out of the car and walked toward the door of her house. Confused by what just happened, Lucas drove away.

As she approached the door she almost felt a sigh of relief. She put the key into the lock and as she turned the key she thought to herself _I'm finally alone_. But only for this short while.

She opened the door to the soft lulls of the TV. Dropping her keys on the table next to the door and turning the corner to the living room she saw the babysitter with a very sleepy Rachel. Although as soon as she saw her mother Rachel eyes widened and a smile filled her face.

"Mommy!" she said racing over toward Cuddy. Cuddy picked Rachel up and kissed her forhead.

"Hi sweetie! Did you have fun?" Cuddy watched her daughter shake her head yes and wander around the living room showing her everything that she had done that night with the sitter.

Now if there was one thing that could always make her feel better it was Rachel. After every bad day, after every loss of a patient, even after every jerk thing that House did or said to her, Rachel could always bring joy back to her life. She truly was the love of her life.

After getting the sitter set and sending her home Cuddy walked upstairs with Rachel and set her down in her large empty bed. Rachel grabbed her mother's pillow and cuddled up to it. Cuddy watched on with joy as she herself changed into her pajamas and slipped into bed next to her daughter. She began to rub Rachel's back and looking up just past her daughter to the other side of the room.

There was a shelf over that that was covered with pictures. Family pictures mostly with her mom, sister and dad when she was younger. Pictures of friends from college but most of the pictures were of Rachel. From the moment she was adopted to today. But there was one picture that caught her eye and she couldn't take her eyes off of. It was one of her with Wilson and House. She couldn't for the life of her remember where it was taken at or why it was taken for that fact. But House actually had a smile on his face and she never noticed but he was looking at her. And not the normal way he did, staring at her, making provocative comments. He was actually looking as though he had true feeling for her.

She thought to herself _Damn you House. Why do I have to feel this way? I have this guy who could honestly make my life better. Someone who could be a father to my daughter; he could take care of me. But yet I'm still stuck on you._

This thought stuck in head as she placed sleeping Rachel into bed and as she drifted to sleep. _Why must I feel THIS way…about House._

Now little did she know, these feelings would be put to the test in a few short hours…


	3. Chapter 3

_Here's Chapter 3. From here the story goes along with "Help Me" but through Cuddy's viewpoint. I should have said that I don't own anything the lovely people at Fox and David Shore have all rights to this story. :D_

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4:45am and the alarm was sounding already. She knew that she had 15 minutes before she had to get up and get ready for the day. She laid in bed staring up at the nightstand next to her bed. Sitting there was a small princess cut 1 carat white gold diamond ring. Something she had dreamed about all her life.

She picked the ring up and placed it on her left ring finger. But something just didn't feel right. It didn't fit. And not physically, physically it was perfect. But it just didn't feel right. She took it off and placed it back on the nightstand. She stared at it for a few minutes but she just couldn't take it. She reached up and slipped it into the drawer on the nightstand.

Suddenly with the ring out of sight things felt a little bit better. She was able to breathe again. She couldn't understand how a ring could take away her breath and choke her. She truly couldn't understand. By 5am she was ready to start her day and try to push back last night's events to the back of your mind.  
She got up and did her morning routine: yoga, showered, got Rachel dressed, got herself dressed, warmed up oatmeal and feed Rachel while she shoveled down some fruit salad and made sure she had everything ready for work. By 6am the nanny was there and took Rachel to take a bath and get her dressed and ready for the day.

Cuddy gathered everything up and before she was even out the door her phone was going off. She shuffled through her bag dreading to see who the caller was. It was a strange sigh of relief to see that it was an emergency call.

"Dr. Cuddy?"  
"Yes"  
"This is the Emergency Director out at Trenton, New Jersey. A crane has collapsed in Trenton. There are several injured and the fatality count continues to increase. We'd like for a crew to be sent over from Princeton-Plainsboro. Thank you."  
"Yes, when I get to the hospital a team will be out within the hour."

It was sad that she was almost relived to get that phone call and for it to not be Lucas. But she thought too soon. Because the moments she put the phone back into her purse it started ringing again. Luckily it was only a text…but it was from Lucas. Contemplating on whether to answer or not. Hitting the ignore button never felt so good. She couldn't believe what she was thinking. How could she be doing this to Lucas? Not just her boyfriend anymore but her fiancé. But still House kept running through her mind.

_No Lisa, you cannot do this. You have to face the facts that this is something you just have to get over. You are with Lucas. He loves you. He loves Rachel. This will all be worth it in the end. You have to push House to the back of your mind. We missed our moment. It's gone now. You have to get that through your mind._

She walked out of the house and stepped into the car. Placing her head on the steering wheel she wanted to cry. She couldn't handle this at all. But she had to focus on work.

_Something serious just happened in Trenton, You've got to pull yourself together. You can deal with everything tonight. Right now you have to focus on the victims and the people that we can save. Your personal life comes second right now. Just focus on where you are going._

She pulled out of the driveway and headed down the road to Princeton-Plainsboro.

Pulling into her parking spot in the parking garage she rushed out and up into her office. She knew that was her sanctuary and for the few minutes before she knew she had to go she pondered on all that had happened last night and all the thoughts that had been running through her head.

_No. Lisa you can't do this. You really can't do this._

She shook her head and grabbed a pink pair of scrubs out of the closet and began to change into them. She was just finishing putting on the scrub top and began pulling up the jumpsuit when she heard the door open behind her.

She didn't even have to turn around to know who it was, which was good actually. House. A small smile appeared on her face but she whipped it away as fast as she could. Turning around she saw a manila envelope.

"A crane collapsed in downtown Trenton" she said to him.

"Don't care." He said. House placed the large envelope into her hands.

She took the package and opened it. It was a beautiful hardcover book. _Approach to the Acute Abdomen._ "My great-grandfather," she said looking in amazement.

"Nah, just a book that he wrote." House said sarcastically. "Open it up."

She looked at him and she opened the cover. She read the inscription that was written in there: _To Lisa and Lucas, Here's to a new chapter. Best, Greg x. _She looked at it for a while.

"Seriously, you're giving this to us?"

"It's a big step you're taking, I wanted to congratulate you. I understand that is the adult thing to do."

She stood there in awe – _how did he know?_

"How'd you know?" _Nothing like just coming out and asking it._

"I've known for a while. The fact that you decided to co-habituate isn't exactly a spoiler. Unless my intel is wrong?"

He grabbed the back of her jumpsuit and helped her put it on. This is something she secretly loved. Seeing him helping her just made those feelings resurface. _Not right now Lisa, after work._

"Trouble in paradise?" he asked.

Why would he even say that? Not that it wasn't true to be honest. She grabbed her hair and put it into a ponytail, pretending to ignore the question she was just asked.

"We have to get to Trenton." She said and walked past him heading out the doors of her office.

But honestly the gift he had given her was beautiful. It was a gift that really showed heart. It was something that she knew that House was capable but had never in a million years expected. It was honestly the best gift she had ever received. But honestly this only complicated her feelings. But the smile she had on her face wasn't going away anytime soon. _I really think I made a mistake. Maybe I was wrong _


	4. Chapter 4

_Sorry that I haven't updated in a while. School has been insane. AND.. Sorry that this chapter is sort of short . We had to get some filler stuff out of the way in order to really dig down deeper. ALL HOUSE AND DIOLOGUE IS OWNED BY DAVID SHORE AND THE LOVELY PEOPLE AT FOX AND HOUSE! :) _

_I hope you are enjoying. (I'll have the next chapter up soon I promise and it will be much better than this one…)_

She arrived at Trenton and saw just what a mess it was. Debris was everywhere. Fire trucks, ambulances, flood lights. Police officers, blockades, danger signs. Helicopters flying overhead searching for survivors. It was bigger than she had expected.

_Okay Lisa, pull it together. Look at this. You need all your focus going into your patients not your love life. _ She took a deep breath pushed her bangs behind her ears and went in search of one of the firefighter on staff when the accident occurred.

All the sudden she heard the hum of a motorcycle. Knowing exactly who it was she made sure she had all her focus on the firefighter.

She looked over at House and knew she had to get to work. Too many lives were in danger here. She was frightened by the screams of pain, the moans and utter fear that people were experiencing. Her problems were nothing compared to this. She looked around again at all the destruction and then threw herself into the craziness of what was going on around her.

She found an older man who had been carried out of the debris and began examining him.

"Sir, we have to get you to the OR. You have a bad wound but we are going to pack in and transport you as fast as we can." The man looked at her, still in shock.

She got up and began talking to a paremedic when all the sudden behind her she heard House's voice.

"Move on. This guy's dead"

She began to come back "His wounds are…"

But she was interrupted immediately. "Forget the wounds. Look at his toes. Athroscalotic emboli. He'll never survive the surgery."

She attempted to come back at him but he persisted. She knew he was right but she couldn't let him know that. But as soon as the ambulance drive came over she knew she had to tell him not to take the man. He was right dammit. He was right; it would be a waste of an ambulance ride, surgeon's time and could honestly take away from someone who really needs the surgery.

She ran off and treated a few more people. She mainly found some minor scrapes and scratches, a few people needing stitches. She treated a few head injuries and packed up some wounds for transport back to the hospital and OR. She saw a couple of people with broken bones and got them ready for transport.

Though she was focused on the patients she was tending to, she knew her mind was wandering off. _What is my future like with Lucas? Is this honestly what I really wanted? I know House doesn't seem like a logical choice but…_

In the middle of her thought she heard House talking about the crane operator and going back to Princeton-Plainsburo.

"House. No, I need you here."

"But he needs me there."

She was getting frustrated. _This is why I need to forget these feelings. He makes me so angry sometimes. Gahh. "_There were over 100 people in that building only 76 have been accounted for. Your team can handle the crane operator for now."

House rolled his eyes. She knew that she had taken away his fun. She took away his challenge. He walked away and she saw him pull out his phone. Knowing that he was off to call Wilson she walked away to tend to other patients.

But it was moments like this she really wondered what she saw in him. He was an asshole to her. He always had something rude to say. But she looked past all that. She knew he cared about everything he did. She **knew **deep down he did care. He cared about the patients. Even if he made it seem like a game to everyone else, when he lost a patient it really got him and it took him a while to get over, if ever.

Little did she know that she would see the extent of what a patient could to him….


End file.
